Steven Links

April 30, 2012

Happy Monday everyone! Here are some happy Monday funny links. Enjoy!

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Haha, He’s All Wet

April 30, 2012

Pouring a bucket of water on someone is one the easiest things to do in the world. All you need to do is get a bucket, fill it with water, find some unsuspecting schmuck, and pour the water over his or her head. Simple. Nothing to it. Too bad the guy in this funny video clip didn’t get the memo. He got three of the first four steps right, but unfortunately that fourth one was a little too much for him to overcome. Although it wasn’t a total failure. The good news, he did pour the water over someone’s head. The bad news though, it was his head. Then there was some more good news. If it wasn’t for his ineptitude at pouring a bucket of water over someone’s head, no one would be watching this video of him. So his fail, kinda turned into a win. So kudos for at least that.

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I Want What They’re Selling

April 30, 2012

I saw this picture a couple of days ago and the first thing that popped into my mind was, I want whatever it is they’re selling. Then I started to wonder what they were actually selling. This interested me more than the picture itself. So off I went on a discovery mission. First I went to Google and typed in the word rumba. That unfortunately was a dead end. All I got was a bunch of sites and images about the style of dance, rumba. Then I tried typing in other terms like rumba fitness, rumba games, and whatever else I could think of after the word rumba. Again nothing. At this point I gave up and went and made a pitcher of lemonade, watched three movies and didn’t think anymore about it. Then when I was least expecting it, a breakthrough. I happened to look at the picture again on the same site I originally saw it on and as luck would have it, someone posted a comment giving the information I so dearly wanted to know. He said they’re part of a cheer squad sponsored by a local tortilla company in Costa Rica. Yay! I can rest easy tonight.

Now you may be wondering why I told you all this? Three reasons. One, I had no one else to tell. You’re my only friends. Two, never give up. Had I given up, I would’ve been forever wondering what Rumba was. And three, breasts will pretty much motivate a guy to do things like search Google for two hours to find of more about them, buy stuff he doesn’t need, clean the gutters, mow the lawn, pick up tampons at the drug store, and get his hair cut like Justin Bieber. Okay, that last one may be a stretch. I don’t know if there are enough breasts in the world to make a guy cross that bridge. I suppose there are, but they’d have to be spectacular.

picture via evil milk

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My Socks Have Never Gone Missing

April 29, 2012

After seeing this image, I think that maybe I’ve been doing laundry wrong all these years, cause in my best recollection, I’ve never put two socks into the washer or dryer and had only one of them come out. Nor have I ever known anyone that this has happened to. Granted I’ve never asked, but I’m sure someone would’ve mentioned it since it seems mention worthy. I think the conversation would go something like this. Sam says, “Hey Pete. Guess what happened?” Pete replies, “What?” Sam says, “I did my laundry yesterday and put two socks into the dryer, but only one came back out. I’m scared now because I think my dryer is eating my clothes and I’m afraid to stick my hand in there for fear it’ll eat me next.” Pete replies, “That’s just crazy talk, Sam. Of course your dryer isn’t going to eat you. It’s an inanimate object. It has no desire to eat you or bring harm to your person. It only wishes to serve you by drying your clothes.” Sam says, “Yeah, you’re probably right. Come to think of it, the missing sock probably just got caught up in my pants or something and will turn up tomorrow … or I thought I put two socks into the dryer, but in actuality only put one. I’m not going to worry about it anymore. You want to go down to the titty bar and look at some titties?” Pete replies, “Sounds good. Let’s grab a taco along the way.” So there you go. You see how mention worthy it is, and I would’ve heard something about this so-called laundry phenomenon. So based on this, I can only assume the missing sock thing is a myth much like dragons or that bacon is the world’s most tastiest food. That last one isn’t actually a myth, but I couldn’t think of anything else to write.

picture via zonx

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This Might Be The Stupidest Logic Ever!

April 28, 2012

Okay, I’ll admit that I’ve worn clothes that are dirty. Not really dirty, but not clean either. Only if it’s an emergency would I wear something if it wasn’t clean. On those rare occasions my thought process is, I need something to wear, but I can’t wear what I’m wearing, so what do I have that’s dirty, but doesn’t stink and doesn’t have any kinds of stains on it? I’ll wear that. Then I’ll do a wash to make sure I don’t have to do the same thing again the next day. Never though have I thought what this picture states. I’m a man, and to me, if something is dirty, it’s dirty regardless of whether it’s in the laundry bag, lying on the floor, or folded up and put neatly on a shelf. Simple as that.

I’d like to meet the person who made this picture. If it’s a man, and if he can’t tell the difference between something that’s dirty or clean even if it’s folded, he must stink like bloody hell, have no sense of smell, be blind, or be with a person who likes folding up dirty laundry just to mess with him. And if it’s a woman, she’s either been with the wrong guy her whole life and I feel sorry for her … or has never had a boyfriend and this is her skewed view of the world based on something she saw on some stupid reality show that actually despite being called a reality show, has nothing to do with reality.

I think this would’ve been a lot funnier, had it said, man logic, if it’s dirty, but doesn’t stink or has a stain on it, it’s not dirty. That to me would be logical. So if you’re wearing dirty clothes right now that were taken off and replaced with clean clothes, but put back on because you had nothing else to wear and they were the cleanest of your dirty clothes, do a wash tomorrow. You’ll be glad you did.

picture via phun

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Transformers Of The Caribbean Might Not Actually Be A Bad Idea

April 27, 2012

The Simpsons writers have come up with another great idea. This time it’s via a movie poster in the background of one of their episodes advertising a movie called Transformers Of The Caribbean. I’m no expert, but this has hit movie written all over it. Think about it, Transformers and Pirates Of The Caribbean and their sequels have made tons of money. So why not combine them into one bad ass film that features robots, pirates, car chases, sword fighting, hot chicks, swashbuckling and explosions? Keep Johnny Depp, Josh Duhamel & Tyrese Gibson. Dump Shia LeBeouf. He’s annoying. Bring back Keira Knightley, Megan Fox & Penelope Cruz. Also bring back John Turturro & Keith Richards for some comedy relief. And start blowing some shit up. This sounds like a movie right up Michael Bay’s and Jerry Bruckheimer’s alley. And it already has a movie poster! That half the film right there. So what’s the hold up Hollywood?

picture via kontraband

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