Actually this mixed message kinda sounds like a dare to me … or is it just a funny coincidence? I’m sure this Nike ad placement was unintentional, but it’s still amusing. I saw it and thought to myself, the person who hung it there couldn’t have planned it any better if they actually planned it.
Although in the mind of some who is easily influenced by these kinds of things, the internal dialogue might go a little something like this. I know it says “DANGER! JUMPING INTO TUNNEL IS FORBIDDEN” … but Michael Johnson is telling me to JUST DO IT. And I don’t think Michael Johnson wouldn’t steer me wrong. So who do I listen to, the police or an Olympic gold medallist? Hmmmmmm, tough one. I bet you if I had those gold shoes I could jump into the tunnel and get back on the platform before anyone noticed. I only have these crappy Reeboks though, so I’d probably get caught. If Michael Johnson was here he’d do it. Ah, forget it, I’m just going to go get an ice cream.
And what can we learn from that internal dialogue? Well just because someone famous like Michael Johnson tells you to do something that doesn’t mean you have to do it. And ice cream rules, even though that wasn’t stated. But we all know it does.
Picture Source: Phun
Since babies aren’t electronic like iPods, doesn’t it make sense that they instead would be an iPood? It makes sense to me. Babies poo a lot, or so I’ve been told. I don’t have any kids so I just assume that they poo constantly … like little poo factories. Every hour on the hour they manufacture a new gift for their parents to unwrap. Ah, the joys of parenthood. Of course since I’m clueless to what really goes on with kids, I actually believe all this. Well not really, but I’m sure it’s not too far from the truth.
Picture Source: LOL Pix
When I saw this sign that read “food items beyond this point have passed their expiration dates,” I thought to myself, now this is a grocery store that puts quality and their customers first. Not many places do this. Most of them would be foolish enough to throw out expired food due to the fact that someone might get sick from it or that they could get sued. That’s really stupid of them when all they need to do is put up a sign like this one did. Hey, we put a sign so that makes selling possibly bad food A-OK. It’s kinda like when someone puts on the hazard lights on their car they feel that act alone entitles them to park anywhere they want regardless if it’s a no parking zone. I wonder how that car owner would feel if I put on a baseball uniform and that meant I could take batting practice on their head and tail lights? I’m sure they’d have a problem with that. Ok, I’m getting off topic here. Back to business.
I bet you this fine establishment also offers the best in cockroaches, and dead rodents in the corner the shopkeeper beat to death with a broom the day before. I can just imagine the feces smeared on the walls and the front window … and the food someone took a bite of but didn’t like so they put it back on the shelf. I wonder if this store has a section for half eaten food? If it’s half eaten then that means it’s half price. Wow, what a deal! I think I’ll buy two. Doesn’t it just make you want to shop there? Yeah, me too.
If anyone knows the address of this place please pass it on to me cause I have some friends coming over for dinner tonight and I’d like to serve them a nice hot bowl of botulism with a dash of salmonella.
Picture Source: Fail Blog
As you can see by this picture of an iceberg that’s shaped an awfully lot like a penis, I think this is proof positive that Mother Nature indeed does have a sense of humour.
Picture Source: Break
I don’t know what you think, but I think this guy might have one too many piercings. I’ve circled the one that I think pushed it too far. For me it’s just thrown off the whole look. Piercings are like a painting, one too many, just like brush strokes, and you ruin the masterpiece.
Picture Source: Break
Gone are the days when street beggars just used their hat or an old tin can to collect money from a passersby. Now instead of those tried and true methods of cash collection, they’re using a new tool, Pay Pal. I guess this makes sense cause if you don’t evolve with the times you get left behind. But still, wtf? That guy would have to do something really special for me to write down his email, go all the way home, turn on my computer, log into Pay Pal, and give him money that way. He’s going to have to have more than just a sign and a sad face for that to happen. He’d at least have to be playing a guitar, singing a song, jumping on one foot, and polishing my shoes. If I indeed wore shoes that needed polishing. Maybe then I’d go that extra mile … but I don’t see that happening.
I love his email 40dude@gmail.com. I guessing homelessdude@gmail.com was taken. I’m wondering though who 1 through 39 dude@gmail.com are … and if they’re are also begging for money with Pay Pay? I should try emailing them and see what happens. My luck though if I did I’d get some weirdo wanting to trade naked pictures of his wife with me. Which wouldn’t be all that bad if when he said naked pictures of his wife he didn’t actually mean naked pictures of himself in a blonde wig and high heels … and just figured I wouldn’t notice. Hey buddy, I notice that kind of thing. I’m not stupid. I can tell the difference between real hair and a wig. At least I can most of the time. 
Image Source: Leenks
