I’ve never thought much about man boobs (moobs for short) and why would I? I don’t have moobs, and the only boobs I want to think about are on women and those aren’t moobs. They’re just just plain regular good ol’ boobs. The kinds I like. I don’t know why men had to come along and get all fat and saggy and start horning in on the boobs phenomenon. That shit ain’t right. As a fellow man, I’m quite disgusted by this. I’m not normally one to talk about my brothers from other mothers, but come on fellas at least tightly wrap a medical bandage around them to flatten them out and keep your shirt on at all times. To me, that seems like the right and only thing to do.

I can’t speak for everyone, but I’m sure most of them will agree, none of want to to see your bouncing man boobs as you run down the beach. Imagine Pamela Anderson on the Baywatch beach performing one of her famous juggle fests in her tight red swimsuit. Now imagine the same thing except replace Pamela Anderson with David Hasselhoff with no shirt and his those tight red shorts of his. Yes it’s pretty horrifying. And speaking of horrifying, check out Mad Magazine’s guide to Man Boobs. Out of these contenders I’m not sure which one would take the prize for being the worst of the worst. They’re all pretty bad. Although, if the perkies were on a chick they might not be that bad. Just saying.

source = evil milk via mad magazine